"Japanese Tricks Dictionary" to go on sale soon?

*Hiragana Times CIA(Cynically Insulting Agency)

A new type of dictionary for non-Japanese called the "Japanese Tricks Dictionary" will soon be going on sale. This dictionary highlights the many tricks used by Japanese organizations and businesses, along with illustrations to aid easy understanding. This dictionary will play an important role in helping people learn the truth about what goes on behind the scenes in Japan. However, it is becoming difficult to publish this book since, fearing an expose, many business circles are pressuring the publishers. Hiragana Times interviewed the editor of the dictionary.

CIA: What are the contents of the dictionary?

Editor: The contents are similar to the articles that were published in Hiragana Times. For instance, "Pachinko." You purchase pachinko balls and when you win enough balls, you can exchange them for products. Then you can exchange the products for money at a nearby exchange desk. In Japan, gambling is banned, but pachinko is not regarded as being illegal since pachinko parlors hand the customers products, not money. This is interpreted in the sense that customers are receiving money by selling their products. There are pachinko parlors all over the country and pachinko is Japan's largest and easiest way to gamble, but it is actually interpreted as being legal.

CIA: What other headings are included?

Editor: In Japan, prostitution is banned, but there are many 'red light' businesses called "soaplands" everywhere. Since soaplands disguise themselves as bath houses, customers pay an admission fee to take a bath. They pose as customers who 'suddenly' fall in love with the women who wash their bodies. It is love, of course. So no one can criticize it.

CIA: What about topics in the political world?

Editor: There are many. For instance, "public projects." Politicians called "Zokugiin" (Diet members who work on behalf of special interest groups and benefit from their efforts) receive a budget saying it is for the benefit of citizens. In fact, they are passing the money on to the industries they are involved with. In return for doing so, they receive political donations and ask for support for their elections. That's why they are responsible for the building of many unnecessary roads and dams.

CIA: How about the field of business?

Editor: Yes, we have plenty. For instance, "Closing hours." Stores which open till late are supposed to close at a certain time due to local government regulations, and so they do not cause a disturbance in the neighborhood. In the case where a store should close at midnight, they close the store shutters at that time, but they actually open again one minute later. Surprisingly, their opening time is one minute later.

CIA: I see. Is there anything else interesting?

Editor: Oh, we have lots. How about Yakuza "Guard fees"? Back many years ago, Yakuza often ripped people off or did something nasty to people in bars. But it has since changed. Yakuza now receive money from bars and similar establishments every month as a "guard fee." Whenever the contracted stores have trouble with violent customers, the stores call the Yakuza. The Yakuza then come to the establishment and the situation settles down immediately. Receiving the payment is not a criminal offense as they receive it as a guard fee.

Comment from CIA
There are so many loopholes, aren't there? By the way, don't you think the guard fee is similar to the security arrangement that exists between the U.S.A and Japan? The U.S.A guards Japan, and in return, Japan provides military bases and purchases American weapons. When the occasion demands, does the U.S.A really guard Japan like the Yakuza?

*Hiragana Times CIA(Cynically Insulting Agency)

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